After polishing off a breakfast biscuit heavy enough to have perceptible gravitational well, the young sorceress's high-powered attorney swept the courtroom like an avenging angel and proceeded to tear the lecherous defendant, and his equally corrupt myrmidons from the faculty, a set of new bodily orifices.
Afterwards, during the post-trial interview, the sorceress stuck her tongue out, in frog-like fashion, as the irate ex-professor, and his discredited cohorts, quietly slunk out of the building, with their sorry tales tucked firmly between their legs.
GAME: Word of the Day (WOTD)
Word of the Day Monday November 5, 2007
woolgathering \WOOL-gath-(uh)-ring\, noun: Indulgence in idle daydreaming.
Similarly, in the meadow, if you laze too late into the fall, woolgathering, snow could fill your mouth.
-- Edward Hoagland, "Earth's eye", Sierra, May 1999
It would be easy to slip off into woolgathering and miss a deadline.
-- Jeraldine Saunders, Washington Post, March 4, 2004
Plagued by guilt, they took refuge in wine, women, and woolgathering.
-- Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust
The soprano roused Fergus from his woolgathering.
-- Sandra Brown, Where There's Smoke
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Woolgathering derives from the literal sense, "gathering fragments of wool."
woolgathering \WOOL-gath-(uh)-ring\, noun: Indulgence in idle daydreaming.
Similarly, in the meadow, if you laze too late into the fall, woolgathering, snow could fill your mouth.
-- Edward Hoagland, "Earth's eye", Sierra, May 1999
It would be easy to slip off into woolgathering and miss a deadline.
-- Jeraldine Saunders, Washington Post, March 4, 2004
Plagued by guilt, they took refuge in wine, women, and woolgathering.
-- Brennan Manning, Ruthless Trust
The soprano roused Fergus from his woolgathering.
-- Sandra Brown, Where There's Smoke
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Woolgathering derives from the literal sense, "gathering fragments of wool."
If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you,
S Adams
S Adams
Farmer Danforth enjoyed a lucid moment of post-coital woolgathering (both literally and figuratively), as his newly shorn harem idly grazed nearby.
p.s. The jury is still out on whether or not sheep are intelligent enough to be able to "woolgather", but since they grow the stuff, I wouldn't put it past them.
p.s. The jury is still out on whether or not sheep are intelligent enough to be able to "woolgather", but since they grow the stuff, I wouldn't put it past them.
Word of the Day Tuesday November 6, 2007
bete noire \bet-NWAHR\, noun: Something or someone particularly detested or avoided; a bugbear.
Even more regrettable, as far as Dame Edna is concerned, is the presence of her old bete noire, the extravagantly disgusting Sir Les Patterson.
-- "The Dame's New Man", Daily Telegraph, April 18, 1998
Never an exceptional student, Andrews somehow managed to navigate the academy's rigorous courses with satisfactory grades, though all forms of mathematics were agonizing to him, remaining what he called his "bete noire" throughout life.
-- Charles Gallenkamp, Dragon Hunter: Roy Chapman Andrews and the Central Asiatic Expeditions
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bête noire is French for "black beast."
bete noire \bet-NWAHR\, noun: Something or someone particularly detested or avoided; a bugbear.
Even more regrettable, as far as Dame Edna is concerned, is the presence of her old bete noire, the extravagantly disgusting Sir Les Patterson.
-- "The Dame's New Man", Daily Telegraph, April 18, 1998
Never an exceptional student, Andrews somehow managed to navigate the academy's rigorous courses with satisfactory grades, though all forms of mathematics were agonizing to him, remaining what he called his "bete noire" throughout life.
-- Charles Gallenkamp, Dragon Hunter: Roy Chapman Andrews and the Central Asiatic Expeditions
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bête noire is French for "black beast."
If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you,
S Adams
S Adams
Word of the Day Wednesday November 7, 2007
fealty \FEE-uhl-tee\, noun: 1. Fidelity to one's lord; the feudal obligation by which the tenant or vassal was bound to be faithful to his lord. 2. The oath by which this obligation was assumed. 3. Fidelity; allegiance; faithfulness.
He was re-elected Governor in 1855, and his administration of the State affairs, both in that and the preceding term of office, was marked by a regard for the public interest rather than party fealty.
-- "Andrew Johnson Dead", New York Times, August 1, 1875
Barbour believed Christian conservatives represented a critical constituency, and he looked for opportunities to display his fealty to them.
-- Dan Balz and Ronald Brownstein, Storming the Gates
The aristocratic O'Sullivans were enriched in return for their promise of fealty to the mighty Democratic party and its rising new leader.
-- Edward L. Widmer, Young America
Whether exploited by traditional religions or political religions, psychological totalism -- the unquestioning fealty to one God, one truth, and one right, embodied in one faith, one cause, one party -- has everywhere provided the tinder of persecution.
-- Jack Beatty, "The Tyranny of Belief", The Atlantic, September 13, 2000
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fealty comes from Old French fealté, from Latin fidelitas, "fidelity," from fidelis, "faithful," from fides, "faith," from fidere, "to trust."
fealty \FEE-uhl-tee\, noun: 1. Fidelity to one's lord; the feudal obligation by which the tenant or vassal was bound to be faithful to his lord. 2. The oath by which this obligation was assumed. 3. Fidelity; allegiance; faithfulness.
He was re-elected Governor in 1855, and his administration of the State affairs, both in that and the preceding term of office, was marked by a regard for the public interest rather than party fealty.
-- "Andrew Johnson Dead", New York Times, August 1, 1875
Barbour believed Christian conservatives represented a critical constituency, and he looked for opportunities to display his fealty to them.
-- Dan Balz and Ronald Brownstein, Storming the Gates
The aristocratic O'Sullivans were enriched in return for their promise of fealty to the mighty Democratic party and its rising new leader.
-- Edward L. Widmer, Young America
Whether exploited by traditional religions or political religions, psychological totalism -- the unquestioning fealty to one God, one truth, and one right, embodied in one faith, one cause, one party -- has everywhere provided the tinder of persecution.
-- Jack Beatty, "The Tyranny of Belief", The Atlantic, September 13, 2000
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Fealty comes from Old French fealté, from Latin fidelitas, "fidelity," from fidelis, "faithful," from fides, "faith," from fidere, "to trust."
If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you,
S Adams
S Adams
Because of Farmer Danforth's fealty to her, the best ewe of the flock, the one with the softest and whitest fleece, and also the loudest bleat, became Mrs Danforth's bête noire.
She grew so inimical towards the stentorian beast that she started seriously woolgathering about hiring some mendacious myrmidon to abscond with this ewe. But she could not muster the bravado to do so, and anyway was too impecunious to afford a hired killer. So she had to keep suffering her husband's quotidian visits to the sheep-pen, knowing quite well how ensorcelled by her rival he was.
She grew so inimical towards the stentorian beast that she started seriously woolgathering about hiring some mendacious myrmidon to abscond with this ewe. But she could not muster the bravado to do so, and anyway was too impecunious to afford a hired killer. So she had to keep suffering her husband's quotidian visits to the sheep-pen, knowing quite well how ensorcelled by her rival he was.
Human is as human does....Animals don't weep, Nine
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
If I might suggest a minor tweak, regarding "noir" ? 
Because of Farmer Danforth's fealty to her, the best ewe of the flock, the one with the softest and <strike>whitest</strike> blackest fleece, and also the loudest bleat, became Mrs Danforth's bête noire.
She grew so inimical towards the stentorian beast that she started seriously woolgathering about hiring some mendacious myrmidon to abscond with this ewe. But she could not muster the bravado to do so, and anyway was too impecunious to afford a hired killer. So she had to keep suffering her husband's quotidian visits to the sheep-pen, knowing quite well how ensorcelled by her rival he was.
A week later, on the occasion of their 25th anniversary, Mrs. Danforth surprised her husband with a lovingly prepared four course dinner by candle light:
During the first three courses, Mrs. Danforth thought to herself that this was one occasion when revenge was a dish best served warm, rather than cold.
- * Consommé of Bête Noire
* Roasted bone marrow of Bête Noire, with toast points
* Bête Noire Burgunione, with homemade bread and hand-churned butter.
* Bête Noire cheese, with garden fruit conserves, and port wine.
During the first three courses, Mrs. Danforth thought to herself that this was one occasion when revenge was a dish best served warm, rather than cold.
Last edited by Darb on Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:14 am, edited 1 time in total.
Well, in fact that was the whole joke: the "bête noire", as "Something or someone particularly detested or avoided; a bugbear", was precisely the whitest ewe. I am short and dark haired (well, I was, now I'm not just greying, but also having less and less hair to get grey, but I used to be dark haired -short I am still). But my friends used to call me "Le Grand Blond", "The Tall Blond Man", because of my absent-mindedness, in honor of a famous french movieBrad wrote:If I might suggest a minor tweak, regarding "noir" ?
Because of Farmer Danforth's fealty to her, the best ewe of the flock, the one with the softest and <strike>whitest</strike> blackest fleece, and also the loudest bleat, became Mrs Danforth's bête noire.
Last edited by voralfred on Thu Nov 08, 2007 2:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Human is as human does....Animals don't weep, Nine
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
Word of the Day Friday November 9, 2007
polyglot \POL-ee-glot\, adjective: 1. Containing or made up of several languages. 2. Writing, speaking, or versed in many languages.
noun: 1. One who speaks several languages.
Yes, Burgess loved to scatter polyglot obscurities like potholes throughout his more than 50 novels and dozens of nonfiction works. He could leap gaily from Welsh to French to Malay to Yiddish in one breath.
-- "Byrne", Chicago Sun-Times, August 24, 1997
There should be polyglot waiters who can tell us when the train starts in four or five languages.
-- Hamerton, Intelligent Life
My parents are both polyglots--they speak five Indian languages each, I speak seven--and they would encourage my reading.
-- Lawrence Weschler, A Wanderer in the Perfect City
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Polyglot derives from Greek polyglottos, from poly-, "many" + glotta, "tongue, language."
polyglot \POL-ee-glot\, adjective: 1. Containing or made up of several languages. 2. Writing, speaking, or versed in many languages.
noun: 1. One who speaks several languages.
Yes, Burgess loved to scatter polyglot obscurities like potholes throughout his more than 50 novels and dozens of nonfiction works. He could leap gaily from Welsh to French to Malay to Yiddish in one breath.
-- "Byrne", Chicago Sun-Times, August 24, 1997
There should be polyglot waiters who can tell us when the train starts in four or five languages.
-- Hamerton, Intelligent Life
My parents are both polyglots--they speak five Indian languages each, I speak seven--and they would encourage my reading.
-- Lawrence Weschler, A Wanderer in the Perfect City
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Polyglot derives from Greek polyglottos, from poly-, "many" + glotta, "tongue, language."
If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you,
S Adams
S Adams
Lurker1: "Are you Bi ?"
Lurker2: "Eh ? No, I'm hetero. Why should you ask something like that ?"
Lurker1: "I heard you speak two languages ... that's bi-lingual."
Lurker2: "Bi-lingual ... meaning I have a forked tongue ?"
Lurker1: "Yes, and I bet your girlfriend loves it when you put it to good use."
Lurker2: "You mean, like in a 'A Fish Called Wanda' ?"
Lurker1:
Lurker2: "Ok, I see where you're going with this. I suppose you're going to tell me your're a polyglot now ?"
Lurker1: "I'm not a polygamist, a polyandrist, or a polly anything, and no I dont want a cracker."
Lurker2: "Shhhhhh ... wait ... I think someone's going to do a WOTD post ..."
Lurker1: ...
Lurker2: ...
Lurker2: "Eh ? No, I'm hetero. Why should you ask something like that ?"
Lurker1: "I heard you speak two languages ... that's bi-lingual."
Lurker2: "Bi-lingual ... meaning I have a forked tongue ?"
Lurker1: "Yes, and I bet your girlfriend loves it when you put it to good use."
Lurker2: "You mean, like in a 'A Fish Called Wanda' ?"
Lurker1:
Lurker2: "Ok, I see where you're going with this. I suppose you're going to tell me your're a polyglot now ?"
Lurker1: "I'm not a polygamist, a polyandrist, or a polly anything, and no I dont want a cracker."
Lurker2: "Shhhhhh ... wait ... I think someone's going to do a WOTD post ..."
Lurker1: ...
Lurker2: ...
Freshly ensorcelled, Farmer Danforth reclined against the young sorceress's thigh and blew lazy smoke rings toward the ceiling, his face growing reflective.
"You can bet your know-where the missus fed Babs to me that night," he said, eyebrows knitting as he pictured his dear-old ewe woolgathering innocently in a corner of the field, unaware of his matrimonial bête noire's stealthy approach - or more likely some half-witted local mercenary myrmidon she'd forcibly enlisted fealty from. "Always gettin' someone else's hands tirty at the time of terminus, she was." He glanced up. "Glad you helped me set it right, my beautiful polyglot."
The young sorceress smiled and fingered her recently-made tooth necklace.
"You can bet your know-where the missus fed Babs to me that night," he said, eyebrows knitting as he pictured his dear-old ewe woolgathering innocently in a corner of the field, unaware of his matrimonial bête noire's stealthy approach - or more likely some half-witted local mercenary myrmidon she'd forcibly enlisted fealty from. "Always gettin' someone else's hands tirty at the time of terminus, she was." He glanced up. "Glad you helped me set it right, my beautiful polyglot."
The young sorceress smiled and fingered her recently-made tooth necklace.
Colourless green ideas sleep furiously
On NASA and the zero gravity pen
Hi Ghost. With no intention whatsoever of being petty, I do feel compelled to point out that your statement about NASA and the zero gravity pen is quite untrue. It struck me as such immediately, and it took little time to find what I believe to be the actual facts. Apparently, the pen wasn't developed by NASA at all, but by the privately owned Fisher Pen Company. According to Fisher, the development cost about 2 million dollars, so that much seems to be true. However, both the Americans and the Russians used pencils prior to the invention of the space pen. The use of pencils was considered undesirable, as there were concerns that fine dust or larger fragments of the pencils might float into the delicate electronic equipment of the spacecraft. That's why NASA started using the space pen in 1967, and just two years later the Soviet Union purchased a batch for use in their own space program.Ghost wrote:Did you know that NASA spent millions of dollars developing the zero-g capable Space Pen (because of gravity ink would not flow down on to the paper) and that the Russian space agency opted to simply use pencils.
References:
http://space.about.com/od/spaceexplorat ... acepen.htm
http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/s/spacepen.htm
http://urbanlegends.about.com/library/b ... ty_pen.htm
Re: On NASA and the zero gravity pen
No problem - this teaches us not to just grab something off the internet and assuume it is true.Mariuslv wrote:Hi Ghost. With no intention whatsoever of being petty, I do feel compelled to point out that your statement about NASA and the zero gravity pen is quite untrue.
If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you,
S Adams
S Adams
Word of the Day Monday November 12, 2007
gesticulate \juh-STIK-yuh-layt\, intransitive verb: 1. To make gestures or motions, especially while speaking or instead of speaking.
transitive verb: 1. To indicate or express by gestures.
In between clearing flooded masks or removing our air supplies, we would gesticulate wildly to point out the giant barracuda hovering nearby, its ugly jaws snapping.
-- Gwyn Topham, "Deep space", The Guardian, November 2, 2002
In conversation, Ferry is friendly and animated, frequently rising to his feet to pace and gesticulate as he talks.
-- Barbara Ellen, "The life of Bryan", The Observer, May 13, 2001
South Africa's attack allowed a miserly two runs per over yesterday, apart from Makhaya Ntini who went for 4 and caused the wicketkeeper Boucher to gesticulate his disapproval.
-- David Hopps, "England's luck changes with order of the boot for Smith", The Guardian, August 16, 2003
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gesticulate is from Latin gesticulatus, past participle of gesticulari, "to gesticulate," from gesticulus, diminutive of gestus, "gesture, action."
gesticulate \juh-STIK-yuh-layt\, intransitive verb: 1. To make gestures or motions, especially while speaking or instead of speaking.
transitive verb: 1. To indicate or express by gestures.
In between clearing flooded masks or removing our air supplies, we would gesticulate wildly to point out the giant barracuda hovering nearby, its ugly jaws snapping.
-- Gwyn Topham, "Deep space", The Guardian, November 2, 2002
In conversation, Ferry is friendly and animated, frequently rising to his feet to pace and gesticulate as he talks.
-- Barbara Ellen, "The life of Bryan", The Observer, May 13, 2001
South Africa's attack allowed a miserly two runs per over yesterday, apart from Makhaya Ntini who went for 4 and caused the wicketkeeper Boucher to gesticulate his disapproval.
-- David Hopps, "England's luck changes with order of the boot for Smith", The Guardian, August 16, 2003
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Gesticulate is from Latin gesticulatus, past participle of gesticulari, "to gesticulate," from gesticulus, diminutive of gestus, "gesture, action."
If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you,
S Adams
S Adams
Word of the Day Tuesday November 13, 2007
perfervid \puhr-FUR-vid\, adjective: Ardent; impassioned; marked by exaggerated or overwrought emotion.
Good movies evaporate, while the market is flooded with inanity. Critics can't do much to stop this, but when you read perfervid reviews of the latest commercial offerings it's plain that they do little to cool things down.
-- Armond White, "Best Movies, Saddest Culture", New York Press, July 5, 2000
Years ago Philip Roth published a perspicacious essay on the pitfalls of writing satire, the gist of which was that the daily absurdities in our morning newspapers too often outdid even a novelist's most perfervid imaginings.
-- Mordecai Richler, "Close Encounters of the Fourth Kind", New York Times, April 11, 1999
Or under the button-down exterior of a familiar Westchester suburbanite was there a giant cockroach eager to mud-wrestle a man in black? Or was this merely a quirk of Miss Polk's perfervid imagination?
-- Mel Gussow, "Novelist Fires Off Opening of Fictional Relay on Net", New York Times, August 2, 1997
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Perfervid is from Latin per-, "through, thoroughly" + fervidus, "boiling," from fervere, "to boil."
perfervid \puhr-FUR-vid\, adjective: Ardent; impassioned; marked by exaggerated or overwrought emotion.
Good movies evaporate, while the market is flooded with inanity. Critics can't do much to stop this, but when you read perfervid reviews of the latest commercial offerings it's plain that they do little to cool things down.
-- Armond White, "Best Movies, Saddest Culture", New York Press, July 5, 2000
Years ago Philip Roth published a perspicacious essay on the pitfalls of writing satire, the gist of which was that the daily absurdities in our morning newspapers too often outdid even a novelist's most perfervid imaginings.
-- Mordecai Richler, "Close Encounters of the Fourth Kind", New York Times, April 11, 1999
Or under the button-down exterior of a familiar Westchester suburbanite was there a giant cockroach eager to mud-wrestle a man in black? Or was this merely a quirk of Miss Polk's perfervid imagination?
-- Mel Gussow, "Novelist Fires Off Opening of Fictional Relay on Net", New York Times, August 2, 1997
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Perfervid is from Latin per-, "through, thoroughly" + fervidus, "boiling," from fervere, "to boil."
If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude than the animating contest of freedom, go from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains sit lightly upon you,
S Adams
S Adams
I'm always willing to oblige....Brad wrote:With effort, Brad managed to bring his perfervid imaginings of the opportunities afforded by the latest WOTD under control ... so that someone else could whack it like a pinata.
"A bill for your services?" Farmer Danforth tremulously expostulated "Perfid tergament! Prima facie, you seemed so perfervid during our embrace, even more than my sweet Babs used to be, I did not expect such a mercenary attitude from you. Such a purblind maladroit I was, to be so cozened by your amicable physiognomy. Alas I am too impecunious for a quotidian recidivism into such an expensive paroxysm, so this seals the terminus of our relationship."
Human is as human does....Animals don't weep, Nine
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
The young sorceress gave a shark-like smile ... her eyes icy cold. She gesticulated again, and the scroll unfurled.
"Your immortal soul is already forfeit, Danforth ... I'm basically offering you a deferred lay-away plan here. However, if you intend to give me a hard time about all this, I could change my mind and collect your soul a lot sooner. Your choice."In exchange for the following goods and services, I hereby relinquish my immortal soul to Giada Rapathian Darshiva:
* 1 contract killing (wife), including corpse disposal fee, and spells of forgetfulness on relevant local authorities, family and acquaintances.
* Tooth necklace memento, with gold chain.
* 1 Cigar (Rocky Patel, Churchill, 1990 vintage).
* Three Amorous Embraces (under 5 minutes each, so the ‘short rate’ applies).
* Round trip magical transport to Bora Bora, plus brunch.
* 12 hours billable time, total.
* 1 sheet of virgin skin vellum, enchanted quill, plus venipuncture (not covered by medical insurance).
I hereby knowingly and freely waive all protections, both mortal and divine, and freely consent to the terms of this bill. I hereby attest that the bill is accurate, complete, and that my signature to the same is completely free of compulsion and manipulation. Soul to be collected at the time, place, and means of my creditor's choosing.
Signed in my own blood, by my own hand,
______________________________
Farmer Danforth
"You flagitious recreant, you" riposted Farmer Danforth in a stentorian voice. "You tried to cozen me once more, but now you evinced your ignoble roué character. I won't sign this mendacious bill: you charged me for the vellum. But from this salient scar I clearly remember inflicting to my ovine uxorious Babs, during one of our most paroxystic moments, I recognize this skin belonged to her. And now you have the indurate effrontery to charge me for it!"In exchange for the following goods and services,
(...)
* 1 sheet of virgin skin vellum, (...)
Human is as human does....Animals don't weep, Nine
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
"Effrontery ?!" she ejaculated. "Blahahahahahahahah !" 
"You have NO idea. However, I’m happy to enlighten you a bit. Behold." The sorceress gesticulated again, and a second scroll appeared and unfurled. This one was already signed however ...
"She sold her soul to cure you, and save the farm from your creditors ... but your quotidian recidivism into bestiality and alcoholism brought her quixotic hopes of a golden happy retirement and perpetual state of marital bliss with you to it’s unavoidably ignoble terminus. She begged me for a love potion next, and if you hadn’t already had murder in your heart, it would have worked, because the potion was otherwise foolproof. At that point, I didn't even charge her for killing babs, or for the demon chef who prepared your last meal together ... I did that for FREE, because you deserved it."
"This was a preordained tragedy – I simply earned some well earned income from both idiots involved. Rapturous Effrontery is practically my middle name. In fact, it *IS* my middle name, if you'll note the neologism at the top of the contract."
"Sign. You have a good 40 years of health left on the cure your wife already paid for, but after that, your soul belongs to me. If you argue further, I'll begin shortening the terms, in my favor. Meanwhile, I have my own bills to pay ... including the next annual installment on my eternal youth and beauty enchantment, so if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get this over and done with so I can get on with my next client. "
V: I had fun writing that - antipodal behavior is sometimes a therapeutic stress reliever.
"You have NO idea. However, I’m happy to enlighten you a bit. Behold." The sorceress gesticulated again, and a second scroll appeared and unfurled. This one was already signed however ...
"You pathetic fool, your wife truly loved you !"In exchange for the following goods and services, I hereby relinquish my immortal soul to Giada Rapathian Darshiva:
Billable charges:
* 2 Miraculous cures (Farmer Danforth’s cancer, and recurrent ovine syphilis)
* $125,000 cash, to pay off farm debts.
* 17 hours (total) of psychological counseling, plus 11 boxes of tissues, and magical commuting costs.
* 1 homunculus – including magical incubation costs, plus 197 hours of subsequent surveillance (of Mr. Danforth’s wayward excursions and exertions) by same.
* 1 love potion.
I hereby knowingly and freely waive all protections, both mortal and divine, and freely consent to the terms of this bill. I hereby attest that the bill is accurate, complete, and that my signature to the same is completely free of compulsion and manipulation. Soul to be collected at the time, place, and means of my creditor's choosing.
Signed in my own blood, by my own hand,
- Mrs. Danforth, on this day, 07-Nov-2007
"She sold her soul to cure you, and save the farm from your creditors ... but your quotidian recidivism into bestiality and alcoholism brought her quixotic hopes of a golden happy retirement and perpetual state of marital bliss with you to it’s unavoidably ignoble terminus. She begged me for a love potion next, and if you hadn’t already had murder in your heart, it would have worked, because the potion was otherwise foolproof. At that point, I didn't even charge her for killing babs, or for the demon chef who prepared your last meal together ... I did that for FREE, because you deserved it."
"This was a preordained tragedy – I simply earned some well earned income from both idiots involved. Rapturous Effrontery is practically my middle name. In fact, it *IS* my middle name, if you'll note the neologism at the top of the contract."
"Sign. You have a good 40 years of health left on the cure your wife already paid for, but after that, your soul belongs to me. If you argue further, I'll begin shortening the terms, in my favor. Meanwhile, I have my own bills to pay ... including the next annual installment on my eternal youth and beauty enchantment, so if you'll excuse me, I'd like to get this over and done with so I can get on with my next client. "
V: I had fun writing that - antipodal behavior is sometimes a therapeutic stress reliever.
Indeed, it was a lot of fun!
Completely flummoxed by the supernal bouleversement that just supervened, no more redoubtable looking, but contrariwise suddenly wayworn, and plangent before the commination that lay ahead, Farmer Danforth realized the inanity of further temporization, took the enchanted quill,submitted himself to venipuncture and signed with his own blood.
Completely flummoxed by the supernal bouleversement that just supervened, no more redoubtable looking, but contrariwise suddenly wayworn, and plangent before the commination that lay ahead, Farmer Danforth realized the inanity of further temporization, took the enchanted quill,submitted himself to venipuncture and signed with his own blood.
Human is as human does....Animals don't weep, Nine
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
[i]LMB, The Labyrinth [/i]
Lurker2: Darshiva screwed up, big time.
Lurker1: Eh ? How so ?
Lurker2: Contracts of immortal soul posession are not truly binding if the target is ensorcelled in any way at the time of signature.
Lurker1: Huh ?
Lurker2: The last clause in the contract clearly states "I hereby attest ... that my signature to the same is completely free of compulsion and manipulation ...". Bounce that against Felonius' post back on back on Nov 9th: "Freshly ensorcelled, Farmer Danforth reclined against the young sorceress's thigh and ..." Clearly, the contract was not executed properly, and therefore is null and void.
Lurker1: Hey, you're right ! How'd you know that ?
Lurker2: I'm a trial lawyer by profession.
Lurker1: Oh. So what happens next ?
Lurker2: Obviously, the Sorceress might come up a little short in the diabolical deeds column when she goes to pay the maintenance fees on her youth and beauty enchantment. The boys downstairs are notoriously unforgiving when it comes to being late on payments.
Lurker1: Ooooh, I like the sound of that.
Lurker1: {ponders} Do you think Danforth will figure it out too ?
Lurker2: Yep ... if only because I PM'd him.
Lurker1: You did ?!
Lurker2: Yes ... along with a bill for my services.
Lurker1: Oh man, and I thought the Sorceress showed effrontery !
Lurker2: Actually, I have a vested interest in this.
Lurker1: You do ?
Lurker2: Yep. I'm working for the Professor of Sorcery mentioned back on page 64 of this thread. That courtroom loss earlier was just the opening round ... i'm in this to win. Besides, I have my own diabolical maintenance fees to pay.
Lurker1: *GULP*
Lurker1: Eh ? How so ?
Lurker2: Contracts of immortal soul posession are not truly binding if the target is ensorcelled in any way at the time of signature.
Lurker1: Huh ?
Lurker2: The last clause in the contract clearly states "I hereby attest ... that my signature to the same is completely free of compulsion and manipulation ...". Bounce that against Felonius' post back on back on Nov 9th: "Freshly ensorcelled, Farmer Danforth reclined against the young sorceress's thigh and ..." Clearly, the contract was not executed properly, and therefore is null and void.
Lurker1: Hey, you're right ! How'd you know that ?
Lurker2: I'm a trial lawyer by profession.
Lurker1: Oh. So what happens next ?
Lurker2: Obviously, the Sorceress might come up a little short in the diabolical deeds column when she goes to pay the maintenance fees on her youth and beauty enchantment. The boys downstairs are notoriously unforgiving when it comes to being late on payments.
Lurker1: Ooooh, I like the sound of that.
Lurker1: {ponders} Do you think Danforth will figure it out too ?
Lurker2: Yep ... if only because I PM'd him.
Lurker1: You did ?!
Lurker2: Yes ... along with a bill for my services.
Lurker1: Oh man, and I thought the Sorceress showed effrontery !
Lurker2: Actually, I have a vested interest in this.
Lurker1: You do ?
Lurker2: Yep. I'm working for the Professor of Sorcery mentioned back on page 64 of this thread. That courtroom loss earlier was just the opening round ... i'm in this to win. Besides, I have my own diabolical maintenance fees to pay.
Lurker1: *GULP*